The Diary - Part 6/7

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Didn't read part 5? You can find it here.

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    "Hey, she is now fine. I will take care of her. You can resume the job now if you feel okay", said Tarun with Aanya. Aanya smiled back, gathered herself and went to the office. Tarun, on the other side, badly wanted to be with his daughter, especially after the last night's conversation about her 12th birthday. However, he could not face his daughter. He had gone inside his room, closed it and started crying. He had cried till his eyes could not produce any tears. He had not attended any calls from his office. He was not a superhero who could be emotionally stable in any tough situation. He is a father. He was a father. He just gathered some strength for a few minutes to make Aanya feel better. Even he was not in a position to explain to Aanya what he was going through. It could complicate the issue.

    After a few hours, Tarun had come outside the room and prepared meals. He had been checking Saanghvi regularly whether she was doing fine. He provided medicines as per prescription. They had lunch, but one after the other. Saanghvi observed his red eyes. She did not respond.

    In the evening, he went to her room and sat in a chair near the bed. Her eyes were closed. "What have I done to this kid?" he thought. He did not want to sit longer facing her. That could trigger another breakdown. He decided to leave her alone. When he was about to leave his chair, Saanghvi holds his hand.

 
    "It was the childhood with a great father. A father everyone dreams to have. A father with whom I can share anything. A father who would listen to me. I had felt very lucky to have him.

   My thoughts had begun to change when such a great father shouted a little at my mother. Mum said it was nothing. Next time, the shout was louder. Mum said it was due to work pressure. The next time shout was further louder. I looked at her. She had not said any reason but just said - 'Nothing to worry about, baby. Things will be fine.' But they had never turned out to be fine.

   I used to pray to God for my father's well-being. You know, God might have been busy then. My father did not change, instead, my feelings were changed about him. From hero to horror; from a friend to an enemy; from love to hate.

   After a couple of months, Mum asked would I be with her. I replied yes. That was the last time I had seen my mum and him being together. Mum said he would return soon. I waited for that moment. That moment, where I and mum be with him. It did not happen.

 

   But, Mumma had been stuck in the past even after the separation. Her story was nice till her classmate became her best love and her husband. After reaching that high, she could not accept her love of life ignoring her. She did not understand what money had given him that she failed to give. She lost all her charm. She gradually let depression soothe her. She quit her job. I had begun to feel like an orphan, just the difference was my parents were alive.

   When I thought everything was lost, then came to our life, Kareem. He was a colleague of Mumma. Kareem stood by her at the toughest time. He requested his boss to get Mumma's job back. He did not run away from the situation. He withstood her mood swings and helped her recover. In that way, he offered a great distraction for her - the job. He offered a great distraction for me - his love.

   Kareem never tried to have any authority over us. He made us feel better. He was dropping me at school, he was helping with my homework, and celebrated my birthdays. Gradually, the bond among us had been developing. I was seeing the cute and charismatic angel I had been missing. One day, he politely asked her for a chance to share his life. She accepted. I had found my parents again. Who said people could have only one true love?

   Life was going good, actually a lot better, thanks to Kareem. After some years, we had received the news that Mr Tarun had left the hospital. But he never visited our home. There was no idea of where had he gone. We ignored him. Fortunately, he did not appear at our door.

   After that, I got a cute little brother. He was as good as his father. Kind-hearted as well as brave. Even my desire to have a sibling had been fulfilled. Our journey was a typical one, from beating each other's back to saving each other's back.

    If you ask about me, well, I had graduated from a top University, married, and had children. Two kids, a boy and a girl. The girl got the looks of Mumma. My husband was good. He did not have a great job. He was not that intelligent. But he was with me, and for me. The second half of my life was focused on helping kids at orphanages. Only people who faced that situation could know that feeling. With great memories and zero regrets, I had peacefully put the end card to my life.

   Suddenly a few days back, felt like I had woken up from sleep. I was in a kid's clothes and then I saw you and Mumma wishing me. I did not understand anything at first. Then, memories started firing one by one. The journey, between you and me, between me and Mumma. Nothing comes alone. Everything brings its shadows. I think my 12-year old heart was not ready to accept the whole journey associated with you. You are seeing the result - the mental distress and panic attacks.
   
   For the past few days, your face just has been inducing fear and anger in me. Nothing else. But when I closely observe, say the attention you are paying to me and for Mumma, I can say you are different. You had not been like this previously. You are now calm, attentive, and caring. Why are you not who you were? What is happening? Who are you?

    Is there a chance that you know what happened? So have you changed? Similar to me, is this your second life? or third life? Whatever it is. But, I may also be wrong. To test my thoughts, last night I mentioned my 12th birthday. Your face had lost all its brightness at once. It was enough to confirm. 

    You know, I just wished to let that person who made me and Mumma suffer know how tough it was to face a situation than simply running into nowhere. It was not a grudge against him. Just to inform him that there will be always more than a way to solve problems. To assure that his daughter will be with him, forever.  Fortunately, this time, I think God has listened to me. Do you know why I have told you all this even though I am partially sure? Because people can have more than one true love. But, the first love, is very special. You were my first love. So, am I right, Mr Tarun? Are you a changed person? Or are you gonna leave me, again?"

    He was frozen. He nodded his head and said, "I am not gonna leave you Saanghvi. Never. Whatever happens." Saanghvi said, "Oh, is that so? In that case, can you come and give me a hug..." Tarun immediately went near her and offered a tight hug and started crying his heart out. He was trying to say something. He wanted to apologize. But he could not talk properly. He was just mumbling words. Saanghvi ran her hand through his head and soothed him. "It's okay Dad, things are gonna be fine." It looked as if a mother were soothing her child.

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    "Hey Taru, how's she doing?" asked Aanya from the office. Tarun replied, "Ha Anu, she is fine. She is sleeping now and asked me to accompany her. So I will be with her and can you use your keys for the door?" Aanya replied, "Good to hear that! Yeah, you be with her. I have the keys with me." Aanya cut the call.

    When Aanya came home, she opened the bedroom door silently. There she saw the father and daughter sleeping peacefully. Quickly she finished things and joined the two.

**END OF PART - 06**

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